Miduradroni
the Incinerators
prefix midura suffix droni
meddus furo
number
010
regulator
melancholic
height
2-4 ft
length
5-9 ft
weight
0.1-0.3 oz
size variance
see entry
I.Q.
0
core temp.
573,070°F
stability
95%
prevalence
70%
constancy
13%
longevity
5-7 years
no. appearing
1-4
near-far
physical appearance
The miduradroni /mɪˈdʊərədroʊni/ is a rounded, weightless stranger with flame-like eye markings and small pupils. Its arms and tail are short, with neotenic proportions in the hands and feet. The mixture of superheated gases inside the miduradroni's body give it an internal temperature of 539,540°F, fifty times hotter than the surface of the sun. Due to its thick, hyper-dense skin, however, it does not radiate this heat outward, and is only slightly warm to the touch. Its skin feels like the surface of an old eraser, and the stranger's presence always smells like burning dust. Although the flesh is somewhat pliable, it resists most stretching, cutting, and tearing, and conducts no heat. Any regenerative ability appears nonexistent.
The miduradroni cannot speak. In fact, its lips are sealed entirely.
an incognizant silence.
environment and generation
The miduradroni appears in residential areas. It is much more likely to appear in buildings that have been standing with minimal changes for at least 100-130 years, and never appears in buildings originally built for commercial purposes (regardless of the structure's current status as a dwelling). Historic, upscale houses are a common home for a miduradroni, as are decrepit, brick-walled apartment buildings which have received only the barest of maintenance over the years.
When it first appears, it balloons in size from a tiny point, a motion that takes less than a second.
behaviour and effects
The miduradroni possesses an impassive and oblivious disposition. It does not engage with the world around it, and instead, floats in the air with neither aim nor intention, only occasionally twitching its fingers or toes. It remains at a height of 5.4-11 feet, and although individual miduradroni do appear to have a preference in terms of where they float, this preference is by no means a constant. Its inflexible body limits it to weak, incidental interactions with the world. It grabs at curtains, pulls at peeling wallpaper, or and knocks books and plates off of high shelves, but otherwise, remains largely passive, though it does seem to gravitate towards sources of heat, such as fireplaces, ovens, and radiators, while avoiding open flame.Ɂ
Ɂ And just what do you think is going to be burning around here?
The miduradroni exhibits several unusual properties. Certain objects catch on fire when placed against the miduradroni's surface, while other objects remain unaffected. Lightweight paper ignites, as does thin fabric, such as silk. Thick paper and heavy cloth, however, display no change in temperature. The miduradroni never burns human skin, but has been known to sear meat placed upon its surface. It cooks eggs, but leaves most plants unaffected. Wood is heated, but rarely catches flame. Certain types of metal, however, become molten almost instantly, while others remain at ambient temperatures.
The miduradroni appears indifferent to fires which it causes.
The miduradroni is small when it first appears, but the presence of heat causes it to grow slightly larger over time, with the largest miduradroni reaching lengths of up to nine feet. The miduradroni is destroyed by freezing temperatures, which cause its body to gradually cool and deflate, with some slight and temporary wrinkling of the surface following this reduction in mass.
interactions with sensitives
The miduradroni does not react to sensitives in any way. Sensitives, however, do notice a slight increase in body temperature when around the miduradroni, ranging from 0.5-1°F.
Although the miduradroni's thick skin resists incidental cuts (preventing it from being punctured by the sharp edges of furniture, errant nails, or other jagged objects), sharp jabs or gunshots can pierce its skin. These violent actions, however, appear to activate the miduradroni's defense mechanism.ƙ, Ƕ
ƙ As I roasted, my skin flaked black, peeled back, burnt pastry layers.
Nu Kong, Phenomenon Papers #1102.
Ƕ It's a hallucinatory effect, where all of your senses will be overwhelmed with the sensations of fire – you'll see white, feel every degree – but it only lasts for a few minutes, and then you'll be fine.
The miduradroni's presence also disrupts dreams to an extent, with nearby individuals (both sensitive and non-sensitive alike) experiencing bad dreams or night terrors. While the miduradroni does not cause non-predisposed individuals to dream of fire, those with existing trauma associated with fires or heat invariably have nightmares centered on this subject matter.
you're burning, burning, burning.
and it's still not hot enough yet.
link to house fires
Despite the miduradroni's otherwise passive disposition, its presence seems to be connected to house fires; indeed, a house in which the miduradroni appears is 6.4% more likely to catch fire.
More likely than what? You're not trying to pull the wool over our eyes, are you?
right in front of you now
you need legal representation £ ª½ ±µ now!
it was my worst nightmare... I left the house, and when I went home, on my doorstep – another mattress?? and this one doesn't have a sanitization sticker ... wait! don't reach for the gasoline – get "free" counsel, help to solve your legal dispute!
are you at risk...
of a house fire ?
there's some kinds of smoke your alarm might not detect ‚¬Å Ó ¬¬´N ¬ do you want to know what they are, or not? »
what happens once it all lights up?
answers you can trust
Another one burns, and the heat gets hotter!!!
We're lighting up furnaces left and right. That's right - you'll have a reason to dance, our mattress disposal expo is coming to your city! Get your closet ready for next year's batch
Why won't they climb out the window???
Are your friends and relatives burning alive?? And they won't leave behind their mattresses? ? ? Insurance fraud, potential medical fraud® and mattress camp exemptions
watching them burn? watching them burn... watching them burn? watching them burn... and you can watch them burn!!!!!
▙▝ The miduragon's entry seems informed by several housefires witnessed and experienced by Zeroworld's writer, though none were as dramatic as the entry would imply.
it's true, it's all true
The flames go on forever,
but you don't have to be alone!! Solar powered coma, & insulated bunker dreams « «¢
Permanent collapse of housing market
Mortgage scams, flip-a-card deals now a thing of the past, thanks to the total and catastrophic failure of the financial ...
▙▝
aging and death
As the miduradroni ages, its inner core cools down, and its body gradually drifts lower and lower, until it lands on the ground. Once settled, the miduradroni remains still, and deflates over a period of several days, like an old balloon. The corpse crumbles into a tan-colored and impossibly fine dust, which scatters on the slightest air current, and mixes fully with any dirt and skin particles already present.
But there was no fire, there never had been, and the intruder was gone, just a pile of ash.
Nu Kong, Phenomenon Papers, issue #1119.
sounds like a volleyball when you hit it
fun to see at a party
car decals for eyes
even if your body isn't actually getting burnt to a crisp, it's not a fun ride